Whew, one year of being single…granted I’ve dated but I was truly single (sleeping alone every night is my qualification). I was still reeling from my disastrous break up, still heartbroken over a man that all the sudden became a unicorn (whom was not the man from the said breakup) and still spending endless nights of misery going over my relationship qualms.
I honestly needed this year. Needed a year to be 25, to realize the little things that make me tick. I’ve grown so much as a human and I can go on and on about it, but I shall spare you the blah blah blah and give you the basics.
Things I’ve realized this year:
1) I’m better of alone than crying in an unhappy relationship (I didn’t cry after my breakup I did it while I was still dating the damn man, NOT GOOD)!!!
2) I don’t need a million fucking friends nor do I need everyone to “like/love” my latest Facebook or Instagram post.
3) The little voice in my head that is constantly screaming at me is ALWAYS right, no matter how often I protest, I need to listen to that bitch.
4) When dating, honesty is the best policy…I’m not trying to hurt feelings but when my voice of reason is screaming at me that you aren’t my person…I need to end it right then and there and not continue to see how it feels or pans out (wishing the male gender did such instead of becoming unicorn and leaving us females in the dark).
5) If someone doesn’t like you, WHO GIVES A FUCK! People don’t have to get along, we don’t have to be one big happy family! That’s not real, you don’t like people, people don’t like you. Dust off your shoulders and move on. But that doesn’t give you the right to trash them or be rude. You can move forth as an adult.
6) Have your moments of weakness and sadness. I’m one hard bitch, I need to be soft but yes, I cry in the fucking shower. We all need to let our emotions run through and we need to get a grasp on it. CRY, RANT, SCREAM AT THE TOP OF YOUR LUNGS, whatever it is…let it out. We aren’t perfect, we have weakness, faults and failures. It makes us better as people.
7) My imperfection is perfection. I’ve always loved myself, but this year of being single and nights alone, the confusion of dating, family and life in general has really taught me that I’m RADICAL.
8) Cheese and rice…something I just keep learning and keep trying to put into my daily routine…FALL IN LOVE WITH YOURSELF AND FRIENDSHIPS! No joke, you make you happy, your friends make you happy. Embrace the craziness of the love you feel for you and them. It’s amazing being in love with the people in your day to day life.
9) Nothing defines you.
10) Get tipsy, laugh till you pee yourself, sing loudly in your car, try something new, eat at different places, go on an adventure (even if it’s on a small one or to a different supermarket)…but most importantly MAINTAIN YOUR WANTS AND NEEDS, STRAY FROM POISONS AND BE YOU!!
11) Keyword for my life currently, is saying NO, to anything I don’t want to do, or am uncomfortable about or when it’s really needed. Don’t let people bully you, talk you into something or allow themselves to overrun your thoughts. NO
I needed this year, to not worry about falling in love, to mourn my losses, to gain friendships, to love myself truly and to not give a rats ass of what anyone thinks of me. As long as I’m a good person, who gives a shit if I’m single, 25 and don’t know exactly what I want.