The “in over my head”

Have you ever felt the feeling of drowning, but not because your fat head is submerged under water. I’m talking about the feeling of drowning from life.

You wake up everyday with a new objective and everyday that objective turns into 14 more objectives and you can’t even finish one.

Lately, my life is the crazy ball of joy but that joy is also killing me. Not in a bad way, I keep getting closer to the ending but I keep adding more and more to my damn plate.

My cup had runeth over, I’m over joyed with not one but two new business adventures that I couldn’t be more proud of and thrilled about. I keep adding more food and not eating any…the plate is staked so high with goodies that I can’t seem to stop.

The last two months of this insanity I call life have been crazy and good…but not crazy good. I had an amazing human as a boyfriend but he wasn’t my damn human…I finally get one man to like me and just my damn luck, I don’t like him (that’s a whole other post that shall be up shortly). After the ending of that I threw myself into these businesses that I will be opening one month apart from each other. Call me crazy, yes…but I just couldn’t turn it down.

For the love of anything holy, a girl can only redecorate her 500 square foot home so many damn times before some one sent her to the nut house (and I’m pretty sure my friends were close to it).

Speaking of which, due to my dire need to open two boutiques at one time while continuing to work the job that pays my bills at night…I haven’t been the best of friend. I also had this crazy relationship that didn’t help on my friend love level. You get to the point that your so wrapped up in what you have going on that you don’t even notice you’ve totally secluded yourself from EVERYONE. I want to share my joy with my friends but currently, they have disappeared…due to me disappearing first.

This is the point that I’ve noticed…I’m way in over my damn head. I also found out, I’m not very good at balancing and I’m also not very good at doing 1 million things at one time.

With all that is going on, I haven’t found time to relax and have time alone to read a book or blog and I certainly haven’t had to to gossip with my girlfriends about boys (and girls for some).

So at which point does one stop?

I think we all get our moments of complete insanity of doing everything that we forget to take the time to just be.

Before I was so wrapped up in finding a human to date me, when I ended that I threw myself into work. Don’t get me wrong I still want a damn man in my bed at night to share the joys of life but I get so focused on one thing and that one things outcome I completely forget about the other aspects of life…such as eating…I haven’t had a full meal where you sit down and enjoy in well over a week…that’s just plan silly seeing as I love food.

Anyways, not really sure what my message to the world is, or why I jumbled all my words down on this blog…and I’m sorry it’s not humorous like normal…but I think I needed a glimpse of just being without the worry of what is piling up in my email inbox or the messages on my telephone…I also missed the blog world. But I’m back…

Also, you’re going to die about the story of my ex boyfriend that I had for 3 weeks…like a high school relationship but I’m 26.


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